The co-founder of UK Black Pride, 45, on articulating her identity, rejecting an MBE, and bowing to no one

At 11 I learned the colour of my skin would dictate the way I was treated. A school friend and I were out in Enfield Town, when a woman pulling a tartan trolley told us the BNP and National Front were marching, and I should hide inside a shop as they didn’t like my “sort”. Right then I realised I’d have a different experience in the world to my blonde-haired, blue-eyed friend.

The “Lady” in my name isn’t a title, it started as a nickname to clarify that I’m not a bloke called Phil.

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